Until 2017, laws related to same-sex couples adopting children varied by state. Some states granted full adoption rights to same-sex couples, while others banned same-sex adoption or only allowed one partner in a same-sex relationship to adopt the biological child of the other.
On 31 March 2016, Federal District Court struck down Mississippi's ban on same-sex couple adoptions. On June 26, 2017, the United States Supreme Court reversed an Arkansas Supreme Court ruling that allowed a law listing parents by gender on birth certificates to stand. The new SCOTUS ruling allowed both same-sex spouses to be listed on birth certificates. These court rulings made adoption by same-sex couples legal in all 50 states.
In 2022, Congress passed the Respect for Marriage Act which requires that states respect marriage licenses of same-sex couples as long as the marriage was valid in the state in which it was performed. This act repeals the 1996 Defense of Marriage Act which defined marriage as the union of one man and one woman and allowed states to decline to recognize same-sex marriages that were performed in other states.
Attitudes toward same-sex parenting have improved as the number of same-sex couples and same-sex parenting overall has increased in the United States. From 2007 to 2011, public condemnation of same-sex parenting in the U.S. dropped from 50% to 35%, while acceptance has remained relatively stable.
In 2023, same-sex couples were more likely to raise an adopted child. 4% of adopted children and 3% of foster children were being raised by LGBTQ+ couples. After Mississippi was the last state to overturn laws banning LGBTQ+ adoption and the federal marriage equality ruling in 2015, there are now protection rights for same-sex couples to adopt throughout the United States which has brought more acceptance and support for same-sex couples when adopting children.
Studies have found that same-sex couples often favor adoption as the method for starting a family. They tend to place significantly less emphasis on the biological methods of conceiving a child than heterosexual families do. LGBTQ families are up to 10 times more likely to adopt than heterosexual couples. Additionally, an organization called Creating A Family reported that 60% of adoptions by LGBTQ families are transracial. One study even found that "gay and lesbian parents were more likely than heterosexual parents to be matched with hard-to-place children, partially because they were more open to being matched with children with hard-to-place profiles." Some argue that these statistics are due, in some part, to discriminatory practices that make it more difficult to adopt for LGBTQ families and deem minority children less “ideal” adoptees.
Background On April 6, 1999, the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) published Overview of Lesbian and Gay Parenting, Adoption, and Foster Care. Key findings included:
There is no evidence to suggest that lesbians and gay men are less fit to be parents than heterosexual couples. Home environments with lesbian and gay parents are just as likely to successfully support a child's development as those with heterosexual parents. Good parenting is not influenced by sexual orientation. Rather, it is influenced most profoundly by a parent's ability to create a loving and nurturing home, an ability that does not depend on whether the parent is gay or straight. There is no evidence to suggest that the children of lesbian and gay parents are less intelligent, suffer from more problems, are less popular, or have lower self-esteem than children of heterosexual parents. Children of lesbian and gay parents grow up as happy, healthy, and well-adjusted as the children of heterosexual parents.
Some researchers have written that children of gay and lesbian families are often subjected to teasing and harassment in their peer groups. They also tend to be singled out and questioned about their family life more than children in heteronormative homes.
Formerly, many children raised by same-sex parents had been born into one of their parents' previous heterosexual relationships. As such, many prior legal disputes were over child custody in cases of divorce. There were biases against the parent who was in a now same-sex relationship; these biases caused courts to disfavor them in awarding custody and visitation rights. The sexual orientation of the LGBTQ+ parent, and not their ability to provide for the child's needs, was viewed as having a negative impact on the child's upbringing. Similar to intrauterine insemination using a sperm donor, the introduction of in vitro fertilization enabled lesbian couples to raise children of their own who had not been born from heterosexual relationships. The development of in vitro fertilization created controversy about co-parent adoption and, in cases where lesbian couples separated, child custody. The practice also generated controversy about the presumption of parenthood: when a woman in a heterosexual marriage gives birth, her husband is legally presumed to be the child's father, but courts have only recently extended this privilege to lesbian couples.
For male same-sex couples, becoming a parent can be more costly because surrogacy is the only way for them to have a biological child. As such, adoption is generally the more cost-effective alternative for same-sex couples. The average cost of adoption is around $30,000, while surrogacy starts around $100,000 and can be upwards of $150,000, making adoption the more affordable option.
Statistics In 2020, the United States Census Bureau determined that same-sex couples (3.1%) are three times more likely to have adopted children than opposite-sex couples (1.1%). Data from 2019 revealed that 43.3% of same-sex couples’ children were adopted and/or stepchildren. Approximately 20.9% of same-sex couples had adoptive children compared to the 2.9% of opposite-sex couples that also had adoptive children.
According to the Williams Institute, as of 2009, "an estimated 20,000 same-sex couples are raising nearly 30,000 adopted children." As of 2011, about two million children in the U.S. were being raised by LGBT parents but could not establish a legal relationship with both parents. In 2019 the American Community Survey revealed that female same-sex households were more likely to have children under 18 in their care (22.5%) than male same-sex households (6.6%).
Professional assessment
There is consensus among the medical, psychological, and social welfare communities that children raised by gay and lesbian parents are just as likely to be well-adjusted as those raised by heterosexual parentsUnited States District Court District of Massachusetts July 8, 2010 and research to support this conclusion is accepted beyond debate in the field of developmental psychology. In 2010, the Third District Court of Appeals of the State of Florida concluded that "based on the robust nature of the evidence available in the field [...] the issue is so far beyond dispute that it would be irrational to hold otherwise; the best interests of children are not preserved by prohibiting homosexual adoption".Third District Court of Appeal State of Florida - September 22, 2010 (PDF) The most important factors in maintaining a child's welfare depend more on socioeconomic status and less on the gender and sexuality of the parents. Issues arise from uncontrolled factors such as discrimination or the inability of parents to get married. Some individuals who oppose child-rearing by gay and lesbian couples fear that it will result in the child becoming gay or lesbian themselves. Established data, however, does not support this claim.
A qualitative study by Goldberg, Kinkler, Richardson, and Downing surveyed couples in same-sex and heterosexual relationships who had adopted children through open adoption. This was notable as little prior research had focused on gender and sexual orientation in open adoption relationships. Data from 90 individuals, including 30 women in 15 lesbian relationships, 30 men in 15 gay relationships, as well as 15 women and 15 men in heterosexual relationships were analyzed. All couples were adopting their first child and they were all first-time parents. The study was conducted within the borders of the United States. Participants filled out a questionnaire and were interviewed by telephone three to four months after adopting their child. All participants were between the ages of 27 and 52 (average 37.7 years), and 90% were Caucasian. Results indicated that gay and lesbian couples tended to emphasize openness and a desire to pursue adoption without hiding their sexual orientation. The birth mother was the consistent birth family member to keep in touch with the adoptive family, and significantly influenced the shaping of open adoption relationships.
Public opinion A 2007 poll by CNN and Opinion Research Corporation found that 57% of respondents believed that same-sex couples should have the right to adopt, while 40% felt that they should not. More recently, a Gallup poll from May 2014 found that 63% of respondents believed same-sex couples should have the legal right to adopt a child.
From 1994 to 2012, seven national polling organizations asked representative samples of Americans their opinions about the legalization of same-sex adoption, with the main question being, "Do you think there should or should not be adoption rights [such as] gays and lesbians so they can legally adopt children?" Results from this period indicate an increase in support as time progressed. In 1994 survey responses, about one in four (28%) favored same-sex adoption, while in 2012 about five in ten (50%) favored same-sex adoption. In studies from 1994 to 1999, only one out of every three Americans (33%) favored same-sex adoption; from 2002 to 2008, support increased to four in ten (40% favorability). From 2009 to 2012, a majority (from 52% to 61%) approved legalizing same-gender adoption, with greater support expressed among young people than among those over 65 years of age. Results also showed that 85% of the Democrats asked were in support of same-sex adoption, while only 23% of the Republicans asked were in support of it.
In June 2018, a YouGov poll found that over half of Americans (55%) believed that heterosexual and homosexual couples would be equally good parents. Majorities also supported allowing gay (53%) and lesbian (55%) couples to adopt and raise children. When asked whether gay and straight couples can be equally good parents, 38% of respondents “strongly” agreed. Women (47%) were significantly more likely than men (30%) to strongly agree with this statement. Most respondents (57%), however, also expressed the belief that a child should be raised by both a mother and a father. Another 15% “strongly” or “somewhat” disagreed with that idea. In this case, men (47%) were more likely than women (30%) to strongly agree with the statement that children should be raised by a mother and father. When asked if lesbian couples should be able to adopt and raise children, 55% said yes while 29% said no. When asked about gay male couples, 53% agreed and 32% disagreed. In both instances, women were significantly more likely than men to agree to same-sex couple adoption. Almost half of Americans (47%) said that it was unfair that child welfare agencies can refuse to place a child with a same-sex couple based on religious objection, while one-third (33%) said it was fair. Forty-six percent supported a Connecticut initiative to recruit members of the LGBTQ+ community to become foster and adoptive parents, but twenty-nine percent opposed that measure.