The following is a list of sketches which debuted on The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien on NBC.
Carried over from Late Night
Many sketches originated on O'Brien's original show, Late Night with Conan O'Brien and were carried over to, and continued on The Tonight Show during O'Brien's short reign. The sketches include:
In the Year 3000 (originally as 2000 on Late Night) Moral Outrage Celebrity Survey Noches de Pasion con Señor O'Brien The Audiencey Awards Movie Casting Mike Merritt's Inner Thoughts New Coins/Stamps Photo Gallery Hanging Out with Jordan Schlansky Conan and Andy On The Aisle Brian McCann on the Spot Pender Sings The Interrupter Small Talk Moment
Twitter Tracker In this sketch, Conan is interrupted by an overzealous announcer (voiced by show writer Brian McCann) while lamenting the increasing number of celebrities who are using Twitter. The announcer attempts to prove to Conan that celebrity tweets are exciting by reading some of his favorites, which all describe mundane activities or are bland statements. Some examples include Ashton Kutcher reporting that he is going to the grocery store, and Jennifer Love Hewitt saying that the weather is beautiful.
The sketch is always accompanied by increasingly elaborate animations in which the bird from the Twitter logo is repeatedly killed. It also includes the announcer trying to persuade Conan to play a game by using a rhyming sentence in which he refers to him as CoCo. Past games have included Complete the Tweet, Trick or Tweet, and Beat the Tweet.
On Thanksgiving, The Tonight Show celebrated Tweetsgiving, during which the announcer read celebrity thanks (tweets that give thanks). Christmas and Chanukah-themed tweets were read during the holiday season. The Tweetsgiving game was "Pilgrim or Pornstar?", where Conan had to guess if the following tweet was by a pilgrim or a porn star.
Conan's Tabloid Moment Having acknowledged the higher profile that comes with being host of The Tonight Show, Conan schemes to beat the paparazzi at their own game by photographing himself in embarrassing situations and selling the pictures directly to the tabloids. To manufacture these moments, Conan makes use of a green screen and some inexpensive props. Past moments have included Conan running over a bible salesman, stealing underwear from Barbara Walters, loading a corpse into the trunk of a car, and kicking babies at a playground (all while drunk).
Traffic Copter As Conan discusses L.A.'s chronic traffic problems, he calls for a view from The Tonight Show'''s traffic copter. The scene then shifts to a fake road filled with gridlocked toy cars. The cause of the traffic jam would always be something absurd, such as a dog celebrating its bar mitzvah, a marauding robot, or a giant Amy Winehouse passed out on the road. Based on a former sketch used on his previous show in similar fashion.
Trump Properties After discussing something topical, Conan will present a video from Donald Trump. In the video, Trump divulges his plans as they relate to the topic. These plans always include constructing something ridiculously expensive, such as a parking space paved with imported marble or a resort on the moon.
Andy'll Try It In this sketch, Andy is given a product to test and review. Past products have included Bacon vodka, a flaming bra worn by Lady Gaga, and a skydiving simulator.
On one occasion, Andy was presented with a Tofurky and Gravy flavored Jones Soda. After refusing to try it, the sketch was renamed "Just Shut Up and Drink It" and the unpleasant task was passed along to LaBamba, who instantly gagged and regurgitated the beverage.
Live Via Satellite After discussing an interesting news story, Conan would sometimes introduce a tangentially related guest who he would claim was appearing live via satellite. At the beginning of the interview Conan would often note the surprisingly good quality of the satellite feed or simply call the technology very expensive. In reality, the guest would actually be in front of a false wall or green screen just a few feet away from Conan and in full view of the studio audience. At the end of the interview, the guest would sometimes walk off camera while still in split-screen format and cross in front of Conan's camera, clearly demonstrating that he was there the whole time.
Wax Fonzie and Wax Tom Cruise While visiting a warehouse full of poor quality celebrity wax figures, Conan identified two as his favorite and purchased them. One was of Henry Winkler as his Happy Days character Arthur Fonzarelli (whose hand positioning caused Conan to comment that he had just finished up at the urinal), and the other was a creepy-looking figure of Tom Cruise. Both wax figures made several appearances on the show.
In addition to appearing in various places around the studio (such as at the urinal in the men's washroom), Wax Fonzie and Wax Tom Cruise were also spotted at the Los Angeles Lakers' 2009 NBA championship celebration and were incorporated into many recurring sketches on the show (such as an installment of "Conan's Tabloid Moment" where Wax Fonzie played a corpse and Wax Tom Cruise played a murderous accomplice).
Both figures were routinely placed in dangerous situations and sustained damage. Wax Tom Cruise was decapitated and dismembered while testing out Universal's skydiving simulator during an installment of "Andy'll Try It". Meanwhile, Wax Fonzie was stabbed while acting as Conan's assistant during a knife-throwing segment. Both figures later were shot out of circus cannons. Wax Tom Cruise emerged unscathed, but Wax Fonzie landed on his face and was horribly mangled. When he was brought out at a later date as part of a "Prop Auction" sketch, the audience audibly gasped in amusement at his appearance.
Wax Fonzie was last seen sitting in the car that was blown up at the conclusion of the "Conan, Please Blow Up My Car" contest, and was presumably destroyed after the explosion. Wax Tom Cruise was stationed nearby to say farewell.
Wax Tom Cruise eventually returned during an installment of "America's New Oprah" and was made to re-enact the real Tom Cruise's infamous couch-jumping incident. Toward the end of the Tonight Show controversy in January, Wax Tom Cruise was featured on Twitter in a picture, wearing a "Team Conan" shirt.
A Message from All On TV After reaching significant milestones in his career, Conan would present a message he claimed was sent to him from his peers in the television industry. The message would consist of a series of clips from various news and talk shows that had been spliced together to create the message to Conan. The message would usually close by insulting either Andy or Max.
A Rebuttal from Conan's Father After Conan says something respectful and thoughtful about senior citizens, he will receive a video rebuttal message from his dad. In the message, Conan's dad belittles Conan's achievements and describes him as insincere and uncaring. He also notes how Conan pales in comparison to his older brother. It is sometimes even suggested that Conan's brother has died as a result of Conan's stupidity.
Conan Visits His Neighbors Conan visits various businesses near the Universal Studios lot, poking fun at the bizarre establishments he finds. Past businesses have included a pornography studio, a tattoo parlor operated by a man named Freak Show, and a store that exclusively sells items decorated like the American flag.
Wing Pang On August 7, 2009, a remote piece aired featuring Conan's visit to an NBC/Universal Studios Gift Shop. During the filming of the remote, Conan interviewed an NBC employee by the name of Wing Pang. Conan was visibly impressed by the man's natural comedic timing and sincere personality and the focus of the remote shifted from the NBC store to Wing Pang, himself. Directly after the airing of the segment, Conan brought Wing Pang on stage and thanked him for his participation in the remote. Wing Pang went on to make two more appearances, the first of which aired on Nov. 5 which was another remote piece featuring an interview between Conan and Wing followed by a fencing match between the two. Wing's third and final appearance was on Nov. 26, which was another remote, this time featuring Conan's Thanksgiving dinner with Wing as well as Jordan Schlansky and Pierre Bernard.
Bon Voyage, Max Whenever Max Weinberg goes on tour with Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band, Conan will imply that Max must leave the show immediately in order to make his flight. The entire platform on which Max sits will then start moving as Max continues to drum. The motorized platform goes out into the street, presumably on its way to the airport. Various things might occur along the way, such as Max stopping at a drive-thru or Max being hit by a large truck.
Checking in on Max in Europe In this sketch, Conan reveals that Max Weinberg has allowed a camera crew to follow him while touring in Europe with Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band. Conan then decides to check and see what Max is doing at that particular moment. A stock footage clip of a person involved in an altercation with police is then shown. The intent is for the audience to believe this person is Max.
Tonight Show Tour-iffic Tram-tacular When their studio was added to the Universal Studios Tour, Conan acknowledged that it could not compete with the other stops on the tour. In order to compensate for this, Conan and Andy would act out exciting scenarios as the tour passed the studio. Past scenarios have included Conan delivering Andy's baby and Conan curing Andy's paralysis.
Back Row Entertainment Feeling that those audience members seated at the back of the studio did not get as good an experience as those seated near the front in "the Cone Zone", Conan would arrange for some special entertainment in the back row. This entertainment was usually something underwhelming, such as a hamster race or a bodybuilder posing.
Kiss Cam Inspired by a recent trip to Dodger Stadium, Conan introduces the concept of couples sharing a kiss when the camera settles on them. These sketches typically deviate from this standard formula by including several odd pairings, such as a hunter making out with a bear or a nerdy Harry Potter fan groping an imaginary woman.
Conan and Andy Do Anime In response to the immense popularity of Japanese anime, Conan and Andy went to the studios of Bang Zoom! Entertainment to record voiceovers for some of their films. These voiceovers consisted primarily of improvising comical dialogue based on literal interpretations of the scenes.
Dumbledore Goes Hollywood Following the release of Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, Conan reports that one the film's main actors has let success go to his head. Footage of Albus Dumbledore (played by Brian Stack) harassing partygoers in Hollywood is then played.
Throughout the video, Dumbledore uses many Harry Potter-themed innuendoes, such as asking women if he can Slytherin to their Gryffindor. At the end of each sketch, Dumbledore is either beaten or pursued by the police and his mug shot is displayed.
Shatner Recites Palin After former Alaska governor Sarah Palin used flowery language during her resignation speech (and later on her Twitter account), Conan called on William Shatner to recite some of her most poetic statements in a dramatic, exaggerated fashion reminiscent of his musical career. During these sketches, Shatner would be accompanied by Mike Merritt on bass and Ronnie Gutierrez or James Wormsworth on bongos.
During one installment, after Shatner had read from Palin's autobiography, Palin appeared and read from Shatner's autobiography (which includes a description of riding an elephant in his underwear).
In later occurrences, Shatner instead recited statements from Levi Johnston's Twitter account, which were crude and pointless rather than poetic.
Conan's Fake Endorsements